Ever have one of those intrusive thoughts where you see someone you don’t particularly like walking down the street and think, “I hope they stub their baby toe and, in their moment of agony, whisper, ‘Darn you, Todd… I should have never wronged you… even though I have no idea what I did because you made this entire scenario up in your ridiculous brain’”?
Like what if this boat sank???
No? Just me? Cool, moving on.
The thing is, we all think we’re the main character. And, to be fair, we are… in our own little universes. But sometimes, the plot twist is realizing that not everything is about us. Some things are bigger than us, out of our control, and—brace yourself—not our problem to fix. Instead of trying to make everything go the way we think it should, what if we just… let it unfold?
I know, I know—sounds suspiciously like “growth” and “maturity.” Gross. But hear me out.
Turning the Bad Into the Good (A Todd Experiment)
Lately, I’ve been challenging myself to swap out my negative intrusive thoughts for something a little more… productive. Like, instead of hoping someone spills coffee on their white shirt right before a big meeting, I imagine them as a baby. A tiny, clueless, drooling creature who has zero idea what they’re doing. And honestly? That perspective shift hits harder than a surprise toe-stubbing.
My mom used to say, “If you don’t like someone, picture them working at their dream job… in a location that is far, far away from you.” And let me tell you, that is some next-level wisdom. Because now, instead of wasting energy being annoyed, I’m manifesting their happiness and my peace. Win-win.
So, here’s your weekly challenge (because I love forcing self-improvement on people who just came here to read a funny newsletter):
Step 1: The next time you have an annoying thought about someone (ex: “I hope Chad drops his phone on his face while doomscrolling in bed”), catch yourself.
Step 2: Reframe it. Picture them as a clueless little baby, just trying their best.
Step 3: Now, wish them success—in a place where you never have to interact with them again. Maybe they get a job in Antarctica studying penguins. Maybe they become an influencer in a niche you’ll never follow. Who cares? The point is, they’re thriving. Elsewhere.
Step 4: Bask in the fact that you just redirected your energy into something that actually benefits you.
The truth is, we’re all just trying to figure this life thing out. Everyone’s got their own battles, their own ridiculous intrusive thoughts, their own moments of being the absolute worst. So instead of letting negativity fester, let’s make life more fun, more ridiculous, and a whole lot less personal.
Be important in your own life. Own it. Make it fun. Make it so amazing that you don’t have time to stress over whether or not Chad got a mysterious crack in his phone screen. And, most importantly—be kind. Even when it’s hard. Even when people suck. Because, at the end of the day, it’s nice to be important… but it’s way more important to be nice.
And if you really can’t bring yourself to do that? Just imagine them living their best life… on the other side of the planet.
